WORLD’S WEIRDEST PIZZA TOPPINGS

Let’s start off with something not too crazy, Sweden’s ‘twist’ on the Hawaiian pizza. With pineapple on pizza still a contentious issue amongst takeaway fans (we’ll diplomatically state that we’re undecided), many are probably not ready to learn that Swedes include ham, pineapple, banana and curry all on one pizza base. We don’t think the individual toppings are bad suggestions; curry sauce on pizza sounds like an amazing bit of fusion takeaway, and banana goes rather fantastically in many south-east Asian curries, but we’re not sure the world is ready for it together.

No. Just no. We don’t care how good it tastes, black is the LAST colour we want to see on our pizza. There are several Japanese pizza and pasta dishes that replace the tomato sauce base with squid ink sauce. Apparently it’s rather tasty (there are many other dishes around the world that involve the calamari being cooked in the ink) but that isn’t going to convince us that ink black sauce looks incredibly unappetising.

Yes, you read that right; cookie crust, a pizza crust made of cookie dough. Sounds genius until you realise that the rest of the pizza is still savoury. Yeah, check out the picture, that’s a shrimp right next to the sweet cookie. Shrimp and cookie. We’ll let that sink in for a bit, maybe you want to go get some fresh air … OK, you’re back? The pizza also comes with a blueberry dipping sauce, so after you’ve made your way through the savoury shrimp and potato pizza, you can have your crust for desert.

You can watch the TV advert here. Check out the confused western (Italian?) chefs looking over in amazement at the cookie crust creation. We get the feeling this was not based on any real life reactions.

We’re sorry Japan, we don’t mean to pick on you again, though this one is drastically different from our other pick. Whilst squid ink pizza stems from traditionally popular Japanese cuisine, the “Double Roll” pizza from Pizza Hut Japan is every cliche about American food shoved into a pizza. It’s a monstrosity of gastronomic terror, western civilisation as viewed by other cultures in one cheesy bite. 646 calories per slice, a crust of bacon wrapped sausage bites, mini hamburger patties, and drizzled with maple syrup. If you ever feel like you’ve had a few too many pizza slices, remember this pizza, you’ll feel healthy by comparison.