It’s finally here. The new season is about to start and we can’t wait. Everything is up for grabs. Who’s going to win the league? Who’s going to score the most goals? What are you going to eat whilst watching the game?
Now that’s a good question. And one we can answer. Tackle the eight questions below and jot down your answers. At the end calculate whether you got mostly ones, twos, threes, fours, or fives and have a read of the perfect match day dish for you. So, pencils at the ready aaaand go!
- Woy H
- No one will be fired
- Rafa Benitez
- Eddie Howe
- De Bruyne
Mostly ‘1’ = Burgers
You love a burger. It’s big, it’s bold and it’s also bloody great. Afterall, you’re all about the big hitters. You only love the biggest clubs (football and sarnies).
You think nothing on splashing £60 mil on a Leicester player, you don’t support a club whose owner isn’t worth at least $10 billion and you’ve named your firstborn Galactico. All worth it when you smash the competition aside and win the league.
You’re the kinda guy that needs a thick juicy patty, loaded with cheese and bacon, with extra onion rings and chunky chips on the side. And who can blame you – it’s a definite winner, every time.
Mostly ‘2’ = Pizza
Your heroes might include Zola or Massimo Maccarone (but that’s just ‘cos his name reminds you of your second favourite dish) and you’re excited about Sarri’s arrival.
For you football is all about passion and, well, pizzazz. You love teams that entertain and dazzle. And love nothing more than watching the beautiful game unfold with a bunch of pals.
That’s why Pizza is the perfect dish for you: easy to share, bursting with flavour and with the potential for some real flair and panache.
Mostly ‘3’ = Kebab
No frills, no pretence, just unfiltered feel good food, the kebab is your match day dish of choice.
You’re not a fan of these big football teams. They’re not teams, they’re businesses, right? You love the smaller, local clubs. The ones with history.
You’re into a proper football match. Forget all this ‘dabbing’, dancing and diving. You want meaty challenges. You want grit and character. You want old school football. You want a kebab and chips. And go heavy on the spicy sauce.
Mostly ‘4’ = Wings
You’re all about the wings. Fast, furious and a little bit fiddly. You love a team that has pace out wide. That plays entertaining and inventive football. So what if they lose? So what if they get barged out of the way by sturdier teams? They’re glorious to watch going forward and that’s all that matters.
Yes, wings can be a bit messy. Yes, they don’t have as much meat on ‘em as a burger. But boy do they taste good. Just think of the explosion of flavours from BBQ sticky wings. Or the glorious kick you get from some buffalo wings? And that’s before you explore the more niche combos, such as chilli and garlic wings, Almond-crusted, Miso-glazed or even Pineapple-teriyaki
Mostly ‘5’= Sushi
The intellectual. The tinkerer. The over thinker. The Sushi orderer.
You’re the kind of person that will take days picking their fantasy side, scrutinising each player’s stats from the last 5 seasons before composing a team made from bright new prospects, each one pipped to be the new Messi.
Sushi is the only choice of food for you. You deftly navigate the menu, picking an intricate compilation of maki, temaki, uramaki, sashimi, and nigiri and then (left eyebrow cocked) you loftily observe as your other friends flounder before just ordering a chippy. You lean back in your chaise lounge, pick up your copy of Proust and chuckle to yourself, ‘ha! Foolish mortals.’